Do You?

If you have multiple children, or multiples, do you spend purposeful quality one-on-one time with each child, away from the other child?  I'm not talking playing one-on-one while the other is in a different room- I'm talking out-of-the-house, activity without the other sibling present.  How much time and how often?

To be honest, we're only really done this purposely a handful of times with Sam and Anna.  Because we are full time working outside the home parents, our weekends are spent primarily enjoying our time as a family of four with a smattering of one parent taking time sans kids to get done what needs to get done.  The few times we've had solo parent/solo child time, it was because both parents had errands to run, and errands with one toddler are a walk in the park compared to errands with two toddlers.  When we are doing something fun- like a park, sledding, children's museum, etc.- it's hard to keep one child from that experience and have them do something else instead.

The first time we separated the kids and parents for specific fun time, we did Mommy-Daughter Time and Daddy-Son Time.  Since practically birth, Anna's been a huge Daddy's girl and Sam's been a Mama's boy.  It's just who they have naturally gravitated to most often.  We did the opposite for our single sibling time so that the child that got less attention typically from the other parent had that uninterrupted time to themselves.  It went well, although our less easy-going Sam had more issues without his sidekick nearby.  He was a little on edge without his sister and constantly asked where she was and said her name over and over.

The second time we separated our twins just for quality one-on-one with a parent time was last weekend.  Again, both of us adults had errands we wanted to run that would have taken twice as long if we were toting two toddlers with us.  This time, I took Sam while Daddy took Anna along for the ride.  Mostly because Anna has been turning a little more into a Mama's girl lately, and Sam- a Daddy's boy.  Daddy took Anna for an oil change and a car wash.  I took Sam to the craft store and shopping.  :)  Every time I go out in public with one child, I am struck with how EASY it seems with one child- like less than half as hard as it is with two toddlers.  We had so much fun at the craft store, I did a detour next door to the pet store to look at the animals in the animal adoption event.  (Looking at the animals there is one of our favorite free fun things to do with Sam and Anna.)  Sam loved the cats this time, but was leery about the ferrets.  His favorite pet du jour was the swimming turtle, and least fav was the tarantula.  He panicked when I moved closer to the glass and I can completely understand his reaction! 

There have been plenty of other times where one stays home or at daycare and one child goes to the doctor- but to me that's a little different when one child isn't doing anything out of the ordinary and the other isn't doing anything fun.  There has been only one day though that one child was at daycare for the entire day and the other was not; when Anna was sick at about 7 months old we brought Sam to daycare so his naps didn't get messed up and so Anna could get 100% attention from an adult.  It was best for the situation then, but I don't think there has been a case since then that one child was sick and the other was completely healthy where it would be a similar benefit.

As they get older and develop their interests more, I am sure that not only will Sam and Anna enjoy time one-on-one with a parent more, but also want the time more and care less when they miss an activity in something they don't really enjoy.