I haven't mentioned this before, but I have been dreading this week since I let myself believe I would get this far in my pregnancy. My husband was gone for a work trip last week, was home for one day, and left again for a second work trip on Sunday. He will be back tomorrow night. He has about 4 work trips a year- it just was horrible timing that these two were so back to back. I knew about this way back in August and I knew I would be around 30 weeks at the time. I just didn't know what the future would hold- would I be on bed rest at the time he was supposed to be gone? What would be the chances of going into preterm labor while he was two time zones away?
Truth be told, I tried to talk him into trying to get out of one or both of the trips several times- but his entire department goes to these shows, so there was no chance unless I was in the hospital. I considered asking a friend to stay with me while he was gone- what if I couldn't put on my shoes without him? What if something happened to my 85 lb aging dog and I couldn't lift him into the car to get to the vet? And the worst- what if I needed to get to the hospital and had to drive myself the 45 minute drive through scary contractions or bleeding that I shouldn't be having? (My family does not live nearby. I do have an amazing friend on standby in case I need help but she is not staying at our home)
I have only one more day to go.
It has been hard. It would still be hard to get through the day with him here, but my husband is amazing and does so much to help me. He keeps me accountable so that I take naps, eat enough, and don't push too hard.
School is getting really hard. I almost started crying in the hall today from the fatigue of staying on top of 21 kindergartners and report cards/testing for the end of the semester- and it is only Wednesday. I had a meltdown after arriving home. I need my husband to comfort me. I need my rock to get me through.
Only 24 hours to go.
4 comments:
If it makes you feel any less alone, my DH is booking a "crucial" business trip to France when I'm 36.5 weeks pregnant. He'll basically be gone for 4 days. And he's my hypnobirthing partner (not that we've practiced much). Luckily he turned down the business trip to Spain that he was supposed to go on when I'd be 37.5 weeks. And I'm only allowing him to go if he tells the company to suck it up and buy him a fully refundable/exchangable (and more expensive) plane ticket just in case.
I'm sorry you had a rough day. :-( I hope today goes by fast and that your husband gets back home safely.
I actually do remember you mentioning this week and being afraid of it in one blog entry way back when.
I'm sorry for how you're feeling right now. (((hugs)))
It's too bad you don't live in Canada. Where I live, all the OBs put mommies who are pregnant with twins on short-term disability at about 29 weeks until they give birth. Then their maternity leave (which is a year here) starts. Can't your OB put you on disability? I'm considering going on it.
Oh Katie! I am so sorry you are having a difficult time with your hubby out of town. It is not easy and even more so now for you. You can do it and he will be home soon.
I could not imagine teaching right now with how far along you are in your pregnancy! It is okay to cry and to let it out. The end of the semester is bad enough. You are a trooper and so very dedicated to your babies so that you can spend more time with them once they are born. Good luck and hang in there, girl!
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