Watching the calendar

So here it is, one week down until the first u/s- and I'm still dutifully taking my PIO shots. Heck, I even refilled the prescription for more PIO without tears (I hate insurance companies, but that is another post). It has been a boring week- no 4 hour drives to the RE to fill my time, summer is winding down and I always get a little bored of not working by the time August rolls around, and my energy level has been at zero most of the week, hence the minimal posting.

My PG symptoms (do you still call it that when you know you are PG?) have been rampant. I have had just about everything any book or internet site lists as a possible sign. Yay for that! I AM still PG! Irrationally, I still POASed this week just to make sure, yup- at 20dp5dt. That line was so dark there was hardly enough ink left for the test line. For record keeping here's the list:

• My bbs are sore and are getting bigger as I type.
• My emotions are even more off kilter than they were on meds alone (For example: We watched Grand Torino and I sobbed- and this was in the middle of the movie when Walt goes over to his neighbor's house; I sobbed uncontrollably at the end too and couldn't stop. That fun wedding processional YouTube video- I cried while watching that as well.)
• I am so tired most of the time. One day this week, I woke up at 9 am, then took a nap from 11 am until 1 pm.
• I have "PG brain." I put something in the freezer that belongs in the cupboard. I went garage saling and went to the same place, twice- only realizing it after I got out of my car.
• Brushing my teeth is torture. I cannot stand the foam in my throat with gagging for minutes.
• So far I've had cravings for frosted cupcakes, cheese curds, brownies, KFC mashed potatoes, etc. And I have aversions to certain foods that I used to be ok with.
• I sneeze. A lot.
• Discharge- 'nough said. But no spotting!
• Headaches.
• And at the end of this week- a queasy stomach that I am sure will progress to vomiting by Monday.
• Other things I mentioned before: nighttime bathroom trips, twinges in my lower abdomen, my super sense of smell, runny nose, bloating etc. have continued off and on.

In other news, my step sister in-law recently went through IVF too. I'm not sure if I mentioned that before on here. She was about 2 weeks ahead of us. She also lives on the other side of the country. Her IVF resulted in a positive test, however, her first u/s did not show good news. I am heartbroken for her, like I continue to be for all those wonderful women whose IVFs around our time frame took a different path than ours. I know the pain of being without a baby too well. It breaks my heart that our PG and baby(ies) will continue to be a reminder to her long after she has begun to heal from the devastating loss. It also brings the reminder again, no matter how hard I try to push it away, that our u/s could end the same. I am so scared to death of that.