The Post I've Been Meaning to Write for a Month

This post has been brewing for almost a month now.  We have major changes occurring over here, and a part of that was responsible for my dismal posting in November.  When you are mulling over completely changing major aspects of your life, it's a little hard to focus on much else.  It may also be wholly responsible for similar absenteeism after the new year.

Here's the crux of the changes:  My husband interviewed for and accepted a position at a new company.  This new job is an increase in pay (yay!) and also closer to our family (yay!).  This also means that we will be moving away from the state we've lived in for the past 10 years, and returning to the state we both grew up in (also yay!)  He was able to put off his starting date until January 2nd (kinda yay) but that also means that even with waiting a month to start, the roots we've put down here can't all be uprooted by then (not yay). 

In other words, we have a house to sell.  I have a job to leave- not the sort of job where you give two weeks notice.  On the upside though, the striping of my bargaining rights as an educator two years ago means I do not work under a contract anymore, so I can quit my job teaching kindergarten before the end of the school year.

So, when all that is added up, this is what we've got:  Daddy's going to be staying with Grandma (my MIL) Monday through Friday while he works, and driving the 4+ hour drive home on the weekends.  I will be solo parenting it Sunday night through Friday night every. single. week.  Our house is on the market, and we've had 5 showings so far.  Our current plan is that the kids and I are staying here until our house sells, because it would be hard impossible to lose my paycheck and also add in a new mortgage payment or rent on top of our current mortgage.  When we have a date of closing (pushed back as far as possible to give my school as much notice as possible), we'll make plans for all of us to be living together again 7 days a week.  That may mean renting for a bit until this Mama finds a new job.  That may mean living with my in laws for a short while too.  I don't want to rush into buying a new home before I know where I will be working.

Although, this may be a even larger change than we originally thought.  I've been pondering lately using this as an opportunity to leave the teaching profession.  Ideally, I'd love to stay at home with Sam and Anna, and so some sort of telecommuting job with hours that would allow Sam and Anna to not attend daycare.  In my wildest dreams, I'd love to try homeschooling them instead of sending them to public school in a few years.  Teaching (and education) isn't what it used to be- in the 10 short years I've been a kindergarten teacher, it has changed a lot.  I'm not sure it is what will make me the most happy anymore, and I'm not sure it is what will be the best fit for my own children either.  Truth be told, the tragic events of December 14th at Sandy Hook Elementary is playing in a role in this line of thinking (but of course, not the only factors).  Like many parents, I'm sure I was equally shook up about what happened.  But, as a kindergarten teacher, I can honestly say that on the next Monday morning, I have never felt less safe at a place I've worked.  I stared at those 19 sets of innocent eyes and felt the magnitude of the job I was and am entrusted with.  That being their teacher also meant that I would take a bullet for them.  But for Sam and Anna- the increase of testing, the increase of behavioral problems of other students impacting the learning of all, the lack of support from people outside AND inside the school walls, and now the concern for their lack of safety makes me question if a public school education is what's best for them.  Like health care and the political system, education in America needs fixing too- and I don't see it happening anytime soon.  And that is as far as I am going to touch upon Sandy Hook on my blog.

Pros to this big life change:  1. My husband's new job is 30 minutes from my parents and an hour from my MIL- pretty much in the middle of both.  I am overjoyed to finish this monkey business of driving 4+ hours every time we want to visit grandparents, aunts, uncles and cousins.  I am thrilled at the opportunities this will provide for Sam and Anna to build closer relationships with their grandparents.  2.  Both of us have been unhappy at multiple parts of our current jobs for some time.  My husband's current company is on track to be run into the ground because of poor management and decision making.  Something needed to be changed on his job end at least, and he's very excited about the new things he will be doing at the new job.  3.  All the other little things we don't like about where we currently are have the potential to be different and/or better.  The things we don't like about our current house could be much better where ever we end up. 4.) If I do decide to get a new teaching position, our future net income could be considerably larger than now.  My husband's larger salary on it's own may create opportunities that are not possible for us now- like homeschooling, or a job for me with non-traditional hours that allow for Sam and Anna to stay home.

Cons:  1.) Um- did you read the solo parenting while Daddy lives Monday through Friday in another state part above?  I know I can do it because I can do hard things, but I can only imagine how much more difficult it may be when you throw in needing to have the house in pristine condition for showings in less than 24 hours notice, and while working a more than full time job as a kindergarten teacher at the same time.  2.)  I love the current situation we have for daycare for Sam and Anna.  I know there is no way we can find something just like it.  (Our pastor's wife who has a childcare background takes care of Sam and Anna with only her 11 month old daughter there, and does preschool like activities with them, for a very reasonable price.  Plus, they have been building such a good relationship with their pastor too- he's our youth pastor and he's soooo good with kids.) 3.) All the little things we love about where we live now we could lose.  For example, the great park we have so much fun at, the local farmer's market, the local children's museum, the wood burning fireplace in our living room, living within walking distance of the public library, friends we'd leave behind, etc. 4.) Leaving my kindergarten class midyear would be extremely hard.  Not just in the explaining it to my class and students' parents kind of way, but also in that I've taught kindergarten for 7 years at the same school.  A huge amount of stuff in that super sized classroom is mine, and really will involve almost the same amount of packing, going though, etc. that our home will.  Yuck- how on earth am I going to carve out the time to pack and move not only our house stuff but my classroom stuff- again, all while working full time and solo parenting two toddlers 5 days a week???

Overall, I'm going with the idea that to take steps forward, you have to be willing to take risks.  We could have stayed where we were comfortable (here) and be resigned to the things we didn't like.  Or we could take the risk that the potential of this opportunity has the ability to be so much better than our current now.  Only time will tell- but I am excited at the possibilities once we get past this hard interim.

Christmas Day

Christmas Morning, Sam and Anna blessed us all by sleeping in until 8 am.  Those kid clocks they received as presents the night before are great!  Both kids were excited to see what was in their stockings from Santa.  Sam was thrilled to see trains... but immediately asked where Toby was because he had asked Santa for James and Toby and only James was in the stocking (Grandma had bought Toby for a gift so Santa couldn't.)  Anna's favorite stocking gift were the candy canes.  Both have played with the moose and deer family figurines endlessly since then, so I'd say Santa did pretty good! 

 

 

Checking out the crumbs left behind from the cookies set out for Santa

After checking out the stocking loot, we had Santa pancakes for breakfast this year.  I couldn't take a picture fast enough to beat Sam licking off some of the whipped cream beard.  Last year we had Rudolph pancakes on Christmas morning, so I'm going to have to spend some time figuring out something new for next year!

We headed to my parents for Christmas Day festivities, and decided that this year we wouldn't fight the nap battle and work hard to find time to fit one in.  Sam and Anna still did not sleep on the 4 hour drive there, even though it was right in the middle of their traditional nap time.  Both did great with zero nap on Christmas Day, just like I thought they would.  No meltdowns at all- and once again, they had excellent behavior the entire time playing with their cousins.

Running around the house

 

Wrestling with cousins Zach (5) and Alex (2 1/2)

Opening more presents- Thomas presents were a common theme for the 3 almost three-year-olds.

My brother's family

The best photo of all 4 kids sitting still for a nanosecond

 

One more Christmas celebration to go next weekend!

Thanksgiving Recap

We headed to our relatives out of state right after I got off work on Wednesday, to try to get there as soon as possible and not delay Sam and Anna's bedtime too much.  The 5ish hour drive was mostly uneventful but I am really looking forward to the day when we don't have to do that anymore! Thanksgiving morning we were able to wake up at Grandpa Butch and Grandma Roxie's and spend a little time with them before the 40+ people arrived during nap time to celebrate Thanksgiving.

 

Sam and Anna have always easily adapted to other unfamiliar people so it was no big deal that there were only 6 people when they went down for their nap but over 40 there when they woke up.  We just took a little bit of time going upstairs in all the hustle and bustle.  Unfortunately, right after Sam got up, there was a major catastrophic event that shook everyone up, which resulted in an ambulance visit and first responders to arrive, never a good thing, much less on Thanksgiving.

 

Sam and Anna's almost-1-year-old second cousin fell off the bed and had a seizure.  I was one of only two adults in the room at the time (neither one were her parents, but I was not the one watching her at the time).  It was the baby's second seizure in less than a week, the other one was connected to a fall as well.  Super scary.  Also crazy because less than a hour before, I had been talking to the mom of the little girl about the first seizure and how I could not imagine witnessing that.  I was the one who told the mom what was happening before she saw her daughter.  The poor parents spent most of Thanksgiving at the hospital, but everything ended up okay and they were able to eat when they got back.  (They have an appointment with a neurologist this week and hopefully can get some answers about the seizures.)

 

Meanwhile, my husband's stepbrother rolled his truck  on his way over to the house due to the weather (but he was okay). and my husband's aunt fell badly while trying to move a vehicle for the ambulance.  She was swollen and bruised, but okay too.

 

After all that, I need to move on to the better stuff:  Sam and Anna had a blast playing with their second cousins. 

 

Anna was in love with Grandma's Hungry Hippos game.

She also made up this game where she dramatically fell out of this rocking chair... and of course everyone laughed because she was so dramatic.  Which resulted in her doing it over, and over, and over, and over again.  My little actress in training.

The little kids "played" pool with plastic spoons.

Sam played a hand game with the big girls.  It was sweet of them to move over and let him try to join in.  Also cute to watch.

The next day, Sam and Anna made cookies with their grandma.

 

We took some time to stop and visit with Sam and Anna's Great-Grandma Marie (92 years old). 

4 generations

With Aunt Lindsay

We also spent an evening at my brother's house before returning home.  That meant in 4 nights and 5 days we visited all 3 sides of our families- whew!

Sam and Anna had fun playing with their cousins Zach and Alex.  Alex is less than a month older than they are.

 

Anna had fun with the "new" to her toys.

The boys had a blast being silly and wild!

Life.

What a week.  What a weekend.  I had fully intended to get back on the blogging wagon with my short burst of a few posts a week or so ago.  Then life happened.  As in, new state mandated standardized testing for kindergarten in which I spent no less than 8 completely dedicated hours assessing my students this past week.  And I'm still not done.  Then a college friend of mine succumbed to the aggressive cancer she was first told about 6 short months ago.  She was 28 when she died- and one of the few truly wonderful women without a fault that I can identify in this world.  It's been a tough week.

We drove Friday night after work to our home state to attend the funeral on Saturday.  Luckily, my MIL lives 30 minutes from where it was, so we had a babysitter for the day.  Unluckily for us, but that looonggggg car ride meant that our still WON'T SLEEP IN THE CAR twosome fell asleep Friday night at 11:30 pm.  Slap-happy overtired toddlers can be entertaining, but stressful too.   (My favorite part was telling Anna to "hang on" in a gas station bathroom  and after grabbing the coat hook and dangling her feet, said "I hanging on!"  Also unluckily for us, but Anna forgot she was potty trained and peed in her car seat, with several hours to go to our destination.  Luckily for us, my MIL had a washer we could use when we arrived.  What's even more awesome than driving with two overtired toddlers for 6 hours and then doing laundry at midnight?  That it was all so we could attend the funeral of my 28 year old friend the next day.

We returned home on Saturday night because I was determined that we would a.) go to a pumpkin patch this year and the wet weather had prevented it so far plus my husband will be on a work trip next weekend so it was Sunday or never as a family this year. b.) have some good aspect of the weekend so it wouldn't completely blow and c.) rake our leaves because our leaf pickup for our area starts Monday and again, the wet weather had prevented it so far so it was now or never.

Anna had yet another accident in her car seat  with hours to go in our drive on the way back and so I waved my white flag, bought diapers at a gas station and told Sam and Anna that we now wear diapers for long car rides.  At least that meant we weren't stopping 5+ times for icky gas station bathroom breaks.  Sam and Anna went to sleep at 10:30 pm (so at least a little earlier than the night before) after again, NOT SLEEPING IN THE CAR ONE SECOND and the side effect meant they slept in the next morning until 8:30 am.  We salvaged our weekend with a perfectly fun time at the pumpkin patch Sunday morning, decent naps to catch up on their sleep deficit, ample time to get the millions of leaves in our yard to the curb, 8 loads of laundry,washing and changing sheets on three beds (and I thought changing the bedding on cribs was a pain), and pumpkin carving since Daddy's leaving town in a few days until Halloween morning. 

Whew!

I have high hopes for a less stressful, less of a downer week. 

A Grand Adventure

We loaded up Sam and Anna and the camper for our most ambitious trip yet- the farthest away to northern Minnesota, about an hour south of the Canadian border.  We were completing our trifecta of visiting all 3 sets of grandparents on their turf (spread out throughout the state of Minnesota) during my summer break.  While it went much better than I expected it to go, I am actually kind of relieved that the end of it also means our big trips are all done for this summer.  I have plenty to get done in the next few weeks, but traveling thankfully isn't on the list anymore!

We left Thursday morning and drove about 5 hours north to the town where we went to college, met and fell in love- Duluth, Minnesota.  I haven't been there since before I was pregnant with Sam and Anna, over 3 years ago.  Sam and Anna did great on the ride, except we were all hot (no air in the camper while driving).  Since Sam and Anna aren't car nappers, we attempted to arrive at about nap time so they could get a rest.  We tried for a while, but both fought it and ended up not napping at all.  We went down to the canal to try to catch a ship going under the lift bridge before meeting old friends for dinner.  Although we didn't see a big ship, Sam and Anna did get to see several sailboats and other boats go under the bridge when it was up.  There were several seagulls they had fun chasing, although Sam is still calling them "eagles."  The friends we met just underwent their first IVF cycle (after 4 years of TTC) and had the embryo transfer 4 days earlier. I'm glad that we could see them again and be some in-person support as other people who have walked in the same shoes.

We stayed overnight at a campground and thankfully had air conditioning to drown out the fireworks we didn't know were going to happen a few miles away that night!  I didn't sleep great, Sam was awake for awhile in the middle of the night, but Anna slept well. 

We headed up the North Shore of Lake Superior for our 2 hour drive Friday morning.  The North Shore is so beautiful... I knew I missed seeing it, but I didn't realize how much I missed living next to the largest lake in the world until I saw it again.  Sam and Anna really liked driving through the tunnels on our way.  We arrived in Grand Marais in time for lunch, and this time Sam and Anna were able to take a short nap after a rocky start of fighting sleep... and Sam climbing into Anna's pack and play!  Friday evening we went to town for the beginning of their big yearly festival and enjoyed a delicious shrimp boil dinner.  Sam and Anna hunted for rocks along the harbor shore before we headed back for the evening.  Friday evening was the worst of our trip... a big storm blew through and with the wind and lightning (so much louder in a camper) Sam and Anna woke up pretty frightened.  Sam was awake from about 3 am until 5:30 am... thankfully they made up a little of that sleep by sleeping in until 9 am.

Saturday we went to town after breakfast and spent some some walking around the street fair- listening to music, loving the amazing view of the lake, as well as eating goodies like mini donuts, fish burgers, and smoked trout chowder.  We also took Sam and Anna out on the break wall to the light house.  I won't deny that I was a little uncomfortable about the safety of my little ones with the waves breaking, but it was important to my husband to take them out there so I kept a death grip on them most of the time, and there were no mishaps.  I know my husband really enjoyed bringing his children to the picturesque town he grew up in.  Sam and Anna barely took a nap and fought it for a long time... again Sam kept climbing into Anna's pack and play and it was touch and go for almost 2 hours before they finally fell asleep for a little bit.

Saturday evening we went fishing with Grandpa Dan on his favorite lake.  It was neat knowing that 30 years ago my husband was a toddler fishing on the same lake.  It was so serene because around the entire large lake was forest and there were zero cabins to be found.  I was really hoping that we might spot a moose, but I knew it was a long shot and so deer were the only wild animals we saw.  Anna had amazing patience even though no fish were caught- she held that fishing pole like a pro too.  Sam liked when the boat was fast on our way back the best. 

After bedtime, Grandpa  Dan babysat so we could go to see the fireworks over the lake.  Although not the biggest firework display I've seen, I can't describe how cool it was to see the fireworks light up the glistening water to the sound of waves breaking over the rock covered shore.  Amazingly beautiful.  Saturday night was the best sleep yet... Sam only woke up once for a few minutes and they still slept in the next morning until after 9 am. 

Poor Sam started to have ear drainage while we were there, a tell-tale sign of a ear infection with tubes and I hated that I could do nothing to help him until we were home.  But overall it didn't seem to be bothering him that much, so I'm grateful for that.

We left after breakfast Sunday morning and planned to drive the entire way home (7 1/2 hours of actual driving) in one day.  Our original plan was to stop for a nap at some point, since we have the only two children in the world who will not sleep in car seats, but we nixed that after our three days of fighting naps.  We didn't want to waste the time trying and risk not having a nap regardless.  So instead we built in lost of breaks to stretch legs when needed.   We stopped at a waterfall first (Sam and Anna's first waterfall).

We stopped for more time to run with the seagulls and look at ships in Duluth, stopped for lunch and dinner.  After leaving Sam and Anna's grandparents' house at 11 am, we finally arrived home at after 9 pm.  Seriously 10 hours of being on the road with two toddlers that didn't nap all day?  There should be an Olympic event for that.  My own bed never felt so good that evening!  As a nice side effect, Sam and Anna slept in the next morning until 9:45 am. (They have been waking up around 8-9 am most days this summer).  Sam was so excited when he realized we were almost home, he exclaimed, "My water towers!" when we took our exit off the highway into our neighborhood, and clapped and cheered.  He shared my sentiments exactly. But really, it could have been so much worse.  Considering it was 10 hours of being in carseats off and on, Sam and Anna did really well, and actually watched less videos than they did on our last big road trip.

(I didn't really take that many photos of what we did during our trip this time- I spent more time enjoying what we were doing instead.)

Camping Take 2

Against what I thought would be my better judgement, we took Sam and Anna camping for the second time this summer last weekend.  I thought for sure after last summer's debacle,  it would be a long, long time before attempting it again.  However, I grew up camping with my family and spent 4 summers as a camp counselor in college, so camping is in my bones and I really want us to camp as a family often as Sam and Anna grow up.  So we went, and I braced myself for more of the same as last year:  horrible sleep by all,  sickness, bugs, crabby people, and probably whatever could go wrong, would.

It wasn't all sunshine and roses... but it was a definite improvement, and not horrible.  I only cried once. :)  (Mostly because of lack of sleep and rain holding us back from the fun we had planned.) Sam slept awfully the first night and was awake most of the time between 11:30 and 4 am. It rained Saturday morning and only cleared up when it was about naptime (figures) which shot our fun plans a little, and then rained again Sunday morning.  It would figure that the only rainy weekend so far this summer would be the one that we chose to go camping.  But besides that, no other huge negatives!

Anna slept great both nights.  Even though they went to bed late and didn't sleep late in the morning, neither child was overly cranky and we didn't have to do any time outs or endure any tantrums.  Naps were pretty good.  The camper was a savior with the rain, even if the close quarters made it challenging to entertain two 2 year olds for hours. 

Sam and Anna adored playing with their cousins and loved camping with their grandparents.

Rain wasn't going to stop us!

Going on a walk in the rain.

Going swimming when the weather cleared up after nap.

Eating first s'mores by the fire.

Sam and Anna's first bike ride.

(My disclaimer:  We do not own our own bike and trailer and therefore Sam and Anna do not have helmets yet.  It was a super short bike ride before bedtime, and that was it.  If we went one more than just this quick one, I would have certainly make sure all of us had helmets on.)

Where we were camping there was a bike trail on an old railroad bed that pass through rock tunnels.  We took Sam and Anna to the nearest tunnel by bike, the shortest tunnel at 1/4 mile long. 



Tunnel #1

When we left on Sunday, we drove to the trail by the farthest away tunnel (the longest at 3/4 mile long), walking to get down the trail this time.  Sam and Anna had so much fun walking through the dark with their flashlights, hearing their voices echo, and pretending to be trains chugging through the tunnel. Sam and Anna are in a huge train phase right now, so this was a perfect adventure to take them on.

Added bonus of a camping weekend:  Sam slept for 13 hours straight the night we got home, and still took a 3 hour nap on time the next day.  Anna slept almost as long.  Now we're pondering a trip in the camper to visit the farthest away grandparents in two weeks...  a 8 hour drive, just a two hour drive south of the Canadian Border and the farthest north Sam and Anna have ever been.