...And Then Things Got Worse

Where I left off in my last post about the crazy beginning of my week: 

Me alone sans husband for the week again.  Sam vomiting like crazy over everything the night before two house showings.  Me taking the day off work to clean like mad.  Getting locked out of our house after the showing.  More bad weather predicted for the following day.

If only I knew then the storm of misfortune that was a brewin' that I would have to weather in the days ahead...

Wednesday morning, I went to work.  The winter storm warning threw down 9 inches of snow atop the ice skating rink-like roads that day.  But still we had school although many around us did not or were delayed.  Sam and Anna went to daycare.  I got called midday about a house showing request for that evening, which isn't supposed to happen because we required overnight notice. I approved it anyway, because I hate to turn someone who might buy our house down, and I rationalized that I could pick up late from daycare and frantically clean for an hour after work.  Most of it was clean from the day before, I just had beds to make, curtains to open, vacuuming and stuff to pick up.   I forgot to add in the snow blowing of the 9 inches that had been dumped upon our driveway in my mental list.  And I forgot that the roads would be treacherous so my usual 30ish minute drive would take twice as long.  Thankfully, I was able to leave work right after the buses left, which bought me an extra half hour of time.  Without that, I would have had 15 minutes to get our house showing-ready only.

So I drove as fast as I could, which meant I had only 45 minutes to do it all.  I had my husband call a neighbor to quick snow blow our driveway and I was on track to get it all done in time.  And then our daycare called me, and informed me that Anna was now vomiting all over.  I quickly finished the last few things and headed over with a bucket, fully aware that I would have to be sitting in my car in below freezing weather, while my daughter sat in her car seat throwing up into a bucket for a hour while random strangers walked around our warm house.  Thankfully, our daycare offered to let us hang out there for the hour and I just sat on the couch holding a bowl for Anna.  Sam kept playing, and our dog had a blast playing with their dog in the backyard.  We headed home as soon as possible, and Anna laid on our couch while I quick threw dinner together for Sam.  Bedtime was only a little late. 

Anna stopped vomiting after I put her to bed, but she started the waking-up-every-half-hour-or-so routine that Sam did Monday night.  I started to feel a little queasy too, and ended up writing sub plans after midnight once I was sure that Thursday we wouldn't all be miraculously better.  Unfortunately, since I left right after the buses left Wednesday, I was less prepared for the following day at school than I usually am.  I also had a big meeting after school that had been rescheduled a bunch of times already that would need to get rescheduled again.  Thursday Anna was mostly better and acted like herself, just with some diarrhea.  But then our daycare provider called and told me that they all came down with the flu and would not be able to watch Sam and Anna on Friday.  I was still queasy and bracing myself for the vomiting on my end so I wasn't sure what to do.  I also could not be gone from school a third day if I could help it, so my husband agreed to take Friday off of work and travel home a day early.  Daddy stayed home with then healthy Sam and Anna on Friday while I took my queasy self to work and pushed through it.  I never threw up.  I'm thinking it was from sheer willpower because I simply could not afford the time to be sick.

Saturday morning we had a Open House scheduled so we cleaned once again, but this time I at least had some help.  15 parties reportedly came through.  (Here's the count so far with our house on the market in a month and a half:  13 showings.  2 Open Houses with 20 total groups through. And yet zero offers.  Nada.  Nothing.  Not even one second showing.)  Then Sunday, I'm sure you can guess what happened... Daddy caught the bug and started throwing up.  Lucky him, he got to lay in bed all afternoon while sick.

It has been an epic week.  An epic week that I really, really, really could have used a little break from this weekend to recharge and get down time before heading into another long week of solo parenting it Monday through Friday with double the standardized testing in Kindergarten and a long 12 hour work day on Thursday because of conferences.  I hope, hope, hope that will be it with the above-and-beyond challenges though, because I'm all tapped out.  And ready for a vacation someplace warm.  Like Hawaii.  Yes, Hawaii sounds very nice...

24 Hours I'd Like to Never Relive

Well, it happened.  Vomitting sick kid #1 while on my own solo parenting Monday-Friday.  But unfortunately, the fun times didn't end with just that.

Yesterday Sam and Anna went to our old daycare because our current daycare provider was sick.  Sam reportedly did not fall asleep during nap, which I can believe quite easily, with the change in day cares for the day.  He's the one that is most affected by change, and less able to roll with the punches.  Unfortunately he's also the child of mine that really requires a nap to function well.

Besides being a little sensitive and attention seeking once we got home, he wasn't horribly behaved though.  For dinner we had his current favorite- tortellini with red sauce.  He (as well as Anna) ate a ton of tortellini, something that is not unusual by any means.  After dinner though, he started complaining that his tummy hurt.  I thought he made had just gorged a little and needed to go to the bathroom.  But minutes after tucking him in to bed for the night, that tortellini and red sauce reappeared all over his bed.  I got him into the bathroom for the second and third episodes, and the fourth was in a bucket in his bed, so I actually fared pretty well in the clean up department.  I am very glad that it wasn't in the middle of the night and I didn't have to clean up everything then. Sam has actually never thrown up at home before, so I've never witnessed it.  Before yesterday, he had only vomited once before and that was at daycare. 

Red sauce: an unfortunate choice for dinner last night.

After that, Sam ended up waking up almost every half hour all night long.  Fearing more vomit, I rushed in every time, which I'm sure didn't help with the frequency.  He never vomited again, but asked for water every time.  I was torn about what to do for the following day- because I wasn't convinced it was the flu.  He had no fever.  Overtiredness and gorging on food is not a reason to stay home from daycare, IMO.  I was already taking the day off of work because I had gotten notified that afternoon about two house showings occurring then and I didn't know when and how I was going to clean everything  in such short notive while taking care of Sam and Anna and working.   Then Sam throwing up added another layer of difficulty.  I wanted to keep Sam home from daycare with me the next day if he was really sick but yet a.) the showings would have meant eliminating his nap that day too, and b.) how on earth was I going to make my home spotless with a sick and vomiting 2 year old that I'm sure would need constant mama-ing?

I am really looking forward to living near family after this crazy period of our lives is over so that I am not all on my own when stuck in situations like this.

So mom of the year award goes to me- since he didn't have a fever at night or in the morning and hadn't thrown up since the initial episodes, I sent him to daycare anyway (yes, less than 24 hours after he threw up multiple times).  Now I am even more sure that he got sick because of a combination of being very overtired and overeating so I feel a little better about my choice, but I still feel guilty about it.  After bringing Sam and Anna to daycare at 7 am after a night of waking up every half hour (and not truly falling asleep until almost 1 am) I hardcore cleaned until the house showings.

Fun times.  Fun times.  And I thought trying to teach kindergartners extremely sleep deprived and with caffeine shakes was a challenge- making your bed while extremely sleep deprived when all you want to do is climb in it because it looks so cozy and the house is so quiet takes supreme willpower.

But the fun doesn't end.  Because then the last showing locked me out of my own house.  We do have spare keys in a secret location under a stone outside... but because of the major freezing rain in the past 24 hours, the location was frozen solid.  I used a mallet from our garage to try to pry it loose... and only succeeded in creating flying projectiles of pieces of rock towards my face.  Yes, one hit me on the face and it hurt. I gave up and called our realtor to ask her nicely if she would come let us in. 

So vomiting, lack of sleep, two house showings midweek with less than 24 hours notice, getting locked out of the house and work drama from trying to take the day off (I'm omitting the details of that on here). 

You can bet this mama had a glass of wine after the kids went to bed tonight. 

It seems like I always get locked out of something when my husband is gone though, so at least I've got that out of the way now, right?

Now tomorrow we've got a winter storm warning (More freezing rain!  9 inches of snow!  Gusting winds blowing the snow over the glare ice!  Yay!)so I'll be trudging precariously to work 40 minutes away after dropping off my little ones at daycare at 7 am (I am doubtful of a third snow day off a school this year).  The fun never stops!

How We're Doing

Well, my husband is starting his third week working a state away, and spending time with us as a family on the weekends only.  Sometimes, I feel like, "hey- I got this part-time single mothering two two year olds while working full time as a teacher (which is more than a 40 hour a week job) thing down."  Other times, I cry and wish there was someone else to take turns getting up during the unfortunate sleep regression Sam and Anna are having probably due in part to the changes in our household.  It's rough when you finally fall asleep after midnight, get woken up multiple times before your alarm goes off at 5 am to start your day with 19 5-6 year olds then finish with two 2 year olds without any real break from little people.  This sleep deprivation I've got going on is close to rivaling what I had when two newborns were in this house.  I'm not at hallucination level yet, but at least in those days I didn't have to look presentable for work and could nap during the day.  It is also very lonely when you spend most of your awake time talking to kids.  Some evenings I've really craved some adult interaction.

I think it would even mostly be okay including that if I could leave my house in any state- i.e. not have it spotless in less than 24 hour's notice for showings.  If people like to use the saying that cleaning with toddlers in the house is like trying to brush your teeth while eating oreos, imagine how well cleaning for a house showing (meaning even more spotless than I'd do for house guests) with two 2 year olds goes... when a.) you still have to work during the day and b.) there's no one to entertain help distract said 2 year olds to keep from destroying what was just perfectly cleaned.  Oy.  We have had 4 showings since I've been on my own during the week, and an Open House this weekend.  I want my house to sell, but I'm privately thrilled that we don't have any more scheduled as of right now, so I should be able to let a few things slide for a couple of days.  Of course, that could also end up biting me in the rear if I get a call for a showing with only a few hours in the evening to get our house perfect again!

One thing I'm really appreciating being in our near future is the possible help that will exist by living near our family.  The fact is that when my husband leaves for the week to work, I literally am pretty much on my own.  There is no going over to my parents for dinner for the evening, or leaving the kids with someone so I can run a few errands.  I can't wait to have my parents babysit on a regular basis once we live closer!

The first weekend, I ended up driving with Sam and Anna to my inlaws so my husband didn't have to drive the 4+ hour drive home.  We also celebrated our "Christmas" with them.  It was my first roadtrip with Sam and Anna alone, and I did indeed survive the whole 5 hour one way drive with them.  That was after cleaning the house in the morning for two showings during the time we would be gone.  On the return trip we may or may not have stopped at McDonalds twice... and watched over 3 hours of movies on the DVD player... I'm not admitting to a thing!  What matters is that we all arrived home with minimal mishaps or tears- myself included, right?

How are Sam and Anna doing with not seeing Daddy Monday-Friday?  Pretty good, I think.  We facetime every evening to say prayers together, so they get to see him every day, even if that isn't in person.  We've done a lot of talking about the whys and wheres and I think they get it on a very basic level that Daddy's working in Minnesota and staying with Grandma because it is too far away to drive home every night.  We've told them that people are coming to look at our house to see if they want to buy it so we can buy a new place to live near all their Grandmas and Grandpas and they are excited about that part of it.  Sam says more often throughout the day that he wants his Daddy, and our daycare provider told me there was one nap that he woke up from when he keep saying while upset that he wanted his Daddy, but it doesn't seem to be adversely affecting either him or Anna in general.  They have both continued to be pretty well behaved (no major behavior changes with the change) so that's been helpful too.

Right now, I'm just taking things one day at a time, and sometimes one thing on the agenda at a time.  If we get out the door for daycare by 7 am without many issues, I feel successful.  If the night goes by without major meltdowns and my temper isn't fried by bedtime, I feel good.  If I manage to squeeze in some playtime between all the chores I have to do that I used to share with my husband M-F: (dinner, bath, bedtime, getting things ready for the next day, etc.), bonus.  My expectations may be low, but at least they aren't too high and resulting in a feeling like I'm failing at doing this all on my own most of the time.  Right now, I feel good.  I've got this and I'm doing okay.

The Post I've Been Meaning to Write for a Month

This post has been brewing for almost a month now.  We have major changes occurring over here, and a part of that was responsible for my dismal posting in November.  When you are mulling over completely changing major aspects of your life, it's a little hard to focus on much else.  It may also be wholly responsible for similar absenteeism after the new year.

Here's the crux of the changes:  My husband interviewed for and accepted a position at a new company.  This new job is an increase in pay (yay!) and also closer to our family (yay!).  This also means that we will be moving away from the state we've lived in for the past 10 years, and returning to the state we both grew up in (also yay!)  He was able to put off his starting date until January 2nd (kinda yay) but that also means that even with waiting a month to start, the roots we've put down here can't all be uprooted by then (not yay). 

In other words, we have a house to sell.  I have a job to leave- not the sort of job where you give two weeks notice.  On the upside though, the striping of my bargaining rights as an educator two years ago means I do not work under a contract anymore, so I can quit my job teaching kindergarten before the end of the school year.

So, when all that is added up, this is what we've got:  Daddy's going to be staying with Grandma (my MIL) Monday through Friday while he works, and driving the 4+ hour drive home on the weekends.  I will be solo parenting it Sunday night through Friday night every. single. week.  Our house is on the market, and we've had 5 showings so far.  Our current plan is that the kids and I are staying here until our house sells, because it would be hard impossible to lose my paycheck and also add in a new mortgage payment or rent on top of our current mortgage.  When we have a date of closing (pushed back as far as possible to give my school as much notice as possible), we'll make plans for all of us to be living together again 7 days a week.  That may mean renting for a bit until this Mama finds a new job.  That may mean living with my in laws for a short while too.  I don't want to rush into buying a new home before I know where I will be working.

Although, this may be a even larger change than we originally thought.  I've been pondering lately using this as an opportunity to leave the teaching profession.  Ideally, I'd love to stay at home with Sam and Anna, and so some sort of telecommuting job with hours that would allow Sam and Anna to not attend daycare.  In my wildest dreams, I'd love to try homeschooling them instead of sending them to public school in a few years.  Teaching (and education) isn't what it used to be- in the 10 short years I've been a kindergarten teacher, it has changed a lot.  I'm not sure it is what will make me the most happy anymore, and I'm not sure it is what will be the best fit for my own children either.  Truth be told, the tragic events of December 14th at Sandy Hook Elementary is playing in a role in this line of thinking (but of course, not the only factors).  Like many parents, I'm sure I was equally shook up about what happened.  But, as a kindergarten teacher, I can honestly say that on the next Monday morning, I have never felt less safe at a place I've worked.  I stared at those 19 sets of innocent eyes and felt the magnitude of the job I was and am entrusted with.  That being their teacher also meant that I would take a bullet for them.  But for Sam and Anna- the increase of testing, the increase of behavioral problems of other students impacting the learning of all, the lack of support from people outside AND inside the school walls, and now the concern for their lack of safety makes me question if a public school education is what's best for them.  Like health care and the political system, education in America needs fixing too- and I don't see it happening anytime soon.  And that is as far as I am going to touch upon Sandy Hook on my blog.

Pros to this big life change:  1. My husband's new job is 30 minutes from my parents and an hour from my MIL- pretty much in the middle of both.  I am overjoyed to finish this monkey business of driving 4+ hours every time we want to visit grandparents, aunts, uncles and cousins.  I am thrilled at the opportunities this will provide for Sam and Anna to build closer relationships with their grandparents.  2.  Both of us have been unhappy at multiple parts of our current jobs for some time.  My husband's current company is on track to be run into the ground because of poor management and decision making.  Something needed to be changed on his job end at least, and he's very excited about the new things he will be doing at the new job.  3.  All the other little things we don't like about where we currently are have the potential to be different and/or better.  The things we don't like about our current house could be much better where ever we end up. 4.) If I do decide to get a new teaching position, our future net income could be considerably larger than now.  My husband's larger salary on it's own may create opportunities that are not possible for us now- like homeschooling, or a job for me with non-traditional hours that allow for Sam and Anna to stay home.

Cons:  1.) Um- did you read the solo parenting while Daddy lives Monday through Friday in another state part above?  I know I can do it because I can do hard things, but I can only imagine how much more difficult it may be when you throw in needing to have the house in pristine condition for showings in less than 24 hours notice, and while working a more than full time job as a kindergarten teacher at the same time.  2.)  I love the current situation we have for daycare for Sam and Anna.  I know there is no way we can find something just like it.  (Our pastor's wife who has a childcare background takes care of Sam and Anna with only her 11 month old daughter there, and does preschool like activities with them, for a very reasonable price.  Plus, they have been building such a good relationship with their pastor too- he's our youth pastor and he's soooo good with kids.) 3.) All the little things we love about where we live now we could lose.  For example, the great park we have so much fun at, the local farmer's market, the local children's museum, the wood burning fireplace in our living room, living within walking distance of the public library, friends we'd leave behind, etc. 4.) Leaving my kindergarten class midyear would be extremely hard.  Not just in the explaining it to my class and students' parents kind of way, but also in that I've taught kindergarten for 7 years at the same school.  A huge amount of stuff in that super sized classroom is mine, and really will involve almost the same amount of packing, going though, etc. that our home will.  Yuck- how on earth am I going to carve out the time to pack and move not only our house stuff but my classroom stuff- again, all while working full time and solo parenting two toddlers 5 days a week???

Overall, I'm going with the idea that to take steps forward, you have to be willing to take risks.  We could have stayed where we were comfortable (here) and be resigned to the things we didn't like.  Or we could take the risk that the potential of this opportunity has the ability to be so much better than our current now.  Only time will tell- but I am excited at the possibilities once we get past this hard interim.

I'm Probably Jinxing Myself...

I can't help it, I just have to say it- although I am fully aware that putting this is writing will inevitably completely reverse all of it tomorrow and I'll think it was all in my imagination. 

This will come across as a brag post, but all mamas are proud of their kids and everyone has a right to profess how proud they are of their children.  Someday, I want Sam and Anna to read the words I wrote about them growing up and know though my words that I was proud of them.

Simply put, I am really loving this age.  This 2 and a half stuff is awesome.  Sam and Anna are such fantastic kids, I am in awe daily at how well they interact with each other.  They know so much- it astounds me what they retain on a daily basis, especially when I have more than one student in my kindergarten class that knows less colors, less shapes, less numbers, letters, sounds, etc (the list goes on and on) than my two do... and the kids in my class are twice their age.   Their comprehension of stories we read is superior than more than a few kids in my class- I can read the same book in my classroom that I read to Sam and Anna for bedtime, and in my class I get a few blank stares and unrelated answers to questions that do not make sense, while at home Sam and Anna can answer my questions(the same ones!) appropriately.  Keep in mind that they are 2 and a half, and the kindergartners in my room are 5 and 6 years old. It seems like every day I am shocked at what they can do or know when I'm working so hard to get those 5 and 6 year olds to get it.  (For example, Sam was pointing out that I had 3 As on my shirt, and 2 Ms.  He said that big M's are for Mama, and little m is in his name.  Then he said- A is for Anna, but where's S?  Oh there it is... pointing in the correct location.  Or when my FIL was trying to stump Sam and Anna on shapes, and tried asking them to identify a octagon- you bet Sam told him that one too!  Ask them what planet they live on, and they can tell you Earth.  Ask them who the president is, and they say Obama. They can correctly identify their right from their left, etc.)

For the most part, both Sam and Anna listen really well and rarely test their boundaries anymore.  We've got a discipline system that works well for us, and I'm thrilled.  Sam and Anna respond wonderfully to choices and counting- a mere counting to 20 will hold off any impatience for toy sharing, or wanting to do something they can't right then (plus, they've gotten very good at counting to 20!).  It makes things so much easier when you don't have to exert your parental power in a power struggle all day long, and then we have more time for fun things!

I also love that we can take them just about anywhere and they will behave well.  I really cannot remember the last disgruntled child I had in a public place.  I think my children must be extroverts, because it seems like the busier we are, the more places we go, the better and happier they are.  They love going on "adventures" and often ask us, "What are we doing today?  Or "Where are we going?" I took them 7 different places on Saturday by myself, without a fuss.  But yet, they can play for hours at home too, together and on their own without needing much adult attention too.

I adore talking with them, having grand conversations about the world around them- seeing what they know and understand, what they are trying to make sense of, what they want to know more about.  Seeing the world through fresh eyes (like when I told them they were "cracking me up," and they touched my arm and said, "Crack crack!" because they had no idea the meaning behind my words and thought I was telling them they were literally cracking me!).

And how they are together is just icing on the cake.  They play together like pros (of course, they have had their whole lives to practice, haha!).  They say please and thank you to each other unprompted, kiss each other's bumps, help each other other, and selflessly give up their things for the other one most of the time.

This week, my husband went on one of his longest work trips since Sam and Anna were born, and may even possibly his longest work trip since they were born.  Regardless, it has been pretty easy this time around.  I keep flashing back to what it was like to solo parent 7 month olds when he went on his first work trip since they came into our lives- the waking during the night, the baby food feeding, the bathing, and all the other stuff that required toting two not mobile babies everywhere something needed to be done, including to daycare at 7 am.  Now, they go to the bathroom on their own, put their clothes and shoes off and on with minimal assistance, walk where ever we need to go, eat with no extra effort required that what I do for myself, and of course, sleep through the night...  I can see why people often have a second child when the first is 2!  This is so much easier than life with twins before the age of 2.

Mostly though, I just spent time each day feeling so blessed that these two wonderful children are mine and love me almost as much as I love them.

* of course, last night BOTH of them woke up once- Sam hit his head against the wall and woke up crying for a minute, and Anna woke up (I think she was cold) and needed to be recovered by her blanket before quickly falling back asleep.  Oh well, I still think my kids are fabulous!

*They are normal kids though, don't get me wrong- Sam likes to push Anna's buttons sometimes like a typical brother and she'll yell back at him.  Sam still gets up out of bed twice before falling asleep even though our rule is that they stay in bed.  Anna is a picky eater, which can be frustrating because she's the one who could use a little meat on her bones.  Still love 'em to the moon and back though!

Numbers

In the last 24 days, I have solo-parented for 16 of them.  That means my husband was home for 8 days of the last 24.  In those 8 days, I had two long days at school for conferences, meaning that I barely had time to see Sam or Anna during their awake time.  That means in the last 24 days, I've had 6 "normal" days. 

While doing it all on my own taking care of two 20 month olds and working full time in charge of 21 5 and 6 year olds during the day doesn't seem so difficult anymore, it has definitely exhausted me to a level comparable with twin babies in a sleep regression or twin newborns exhaustion.  I've seriously slacked on photo taking, blog posting, commenting, house cleaning and other things Inot worth mentioning.  We've got an okay routine down but I am looking forward to a little parenting help again.  During the past month, Sam and Anna have learned that after our bedtime story, they should walk to their cribs in their room and wait to be lifted in.  While I kind of like this new development, it does make them seem awfully grown up.

My biggest nemesis?  Cooking meals.  Ugh.  I cannot wait until I do not have to come up with what myself and two toddlers should eat and then prepare it while entertaining said toddlers all by myself.  I'm getting a little tired of mac and cheese, pasta, and chicken nuggets too. A cook I am NOT. (obviously, if our diet has consisted of mac and cheese, pasta and chicken nuggets, ha!)

My solo parenting days draw to a close tonight, and that should be it until mid January, thank goodness.  I don't think their will be another time as bad as this for at least another year.  The past 24 days have been one heck of a ride with crazy parents of students, illness of my own children, teething, bad weather, and work stresses, but I'd like to get off now, thank you very much.  Time to divvy up the responsibilities of child rearing again!

Perspective

I'm in the middle of my second week of several days in a row of solo parenting.  There will be a third trip taken by my husband this month at the end of the week, making it 3 solo parenting expeditions in as many weeks.  This time of year is rough for me anyway, with the end of the grading period, massive assessments for report cards, completing report cards, preparing and then conducting conferences on two longgggg days.  It hasn't been easy on a lot of levels, also because Sam's cutting 2 teeth right now, and hasn't been his usual happy self (meaning multiple night wakings, starting his day before 6 am, lots of fussing, lots of crabbiness which manifests in kicking and hitting and extra clingy-ness).  Do I also need to mention that things that are tough on my own two children make my job tougher at the same time- like time changes, weather changes, etc by bringing out the crazies in my students and their parents?

I'm longing for the days when my husband is home again for more than a few days in between trips.  Longing for a break to go somewhere sans two toddlers under two.  Ready for a return to normal with no unexpected power outages, or crazy parents of students making my job harder than it already is.  Ready for a little help at home.  Excited to go to the bathroom without an audience.

This post is about more than that though.  As I was thinking about typing up something here, I read a comment on another blog that stuck with me.  Veteran's Day was on Friday, and there are so many families that are in similar situations to mine... except their parenting partner doesn't have the luxury of a few days home every week.  Many families have a parent deployed and are solo parenting for much, much longer than I have been.  When I keep that in my mind, solo parenting my twin toddlers for the second week in a row right before a 12 hour day of parent teacher conferences doesn't seem all that bad, after all.

Long Time No See

Wow- I don't think I've gone a whole week between posts before.  It's been a busy week with lots going on!  First off, Sam has another ear infection.  Secondly, both Sam and Anna are walking more and more, but still aren't very steady on their feet, so they need a shadow where ever they go to prevent as many mishaps as possible.  Then add in the end of the school year complete with the kindergarten concert and end-of-the-year testing as well as a whirlwind weekend after a 4 hour road trip, and who would even have time to turn on the computer?  I've been a little exhausted and busy, busy busy!

This past weekend, we went back to our home state and stayed at my parents' house.  We went out to dinner with my MIL on Saturday, and went to Sam and Anna's great grandma's 90th birthday party Sunday afternoon (my FIL's side).  After a stop back at my parents for a quickie nap, we headed out for my cousin's wedding.  That's three sets of relatives and grandparents in 24 hours!  Sam and Anna did great, especially considering it was a lot of unfamiliar faces in such a short time. 

While we were at the park for the 90th birthday picnic, there were tornado warnings.  Really not fun when you have 2 1-year-olds under your care.  The tornado warnings continued after we got back while Sam and Anna napped, but thankfully, they were napping in the basement anyway, so that made things more convenient.  We drove across the Twin Cities to get to the wedding through tornado watches, but thankfully, although the rain put a damper on our weekend plans, tornadoes did not.

Then, although I swore after last time we'd never do it again, we attempted to drive the 4 hours home at bedtime, hoping (praying fervently, actually) that Sam and Anna would sleep most of the car ride home.  If I didn't learn last time, I better have learned my lesson now.  Once again, Anna hardly slept at all.  I really thought she would, because last time she ended up having a slightly dirty diaper (that we could not smell), and we attributed the lack of sleep to that.  So we got home at 11:30 pm with an extremely overtired Anna and this time I KNOW I will not try that again. 

My saving grace was that I took this Monday off of work anyway.  I slept in and had a massage appointment for noon (the last of my push/cut present gift certificate).  A great start to another hectic and crazy busy week, since my husband is out of town for work all week and I'm solo-parenting it again.

Just a few photos from our weekend:

 With Grandma Dianne (my mom)

 With Aunt Mary

 With Sam and Anna's Great Grandma (FIL's side)

  At the wedding reception

 Pictures with Dad, since I seem to not take that many

This was one of the only ways we could keep Sam awake after a long day!

They adored this glass wall at the reception

(The mark on Anna's nose is a scab.  We have no idea how she got it- she just woke up one morning with it like that.I'm thinking she just scratched her nose with her own finger.)

Solo Starting Sunday

My husband is out of town for work this week again... I think I'm at the point when it's beginning to feel a little old hat to solo parent my two active babies, er I mean- toddlers for several days in a row. I wasn't worried or stressed about this week in advance like I have been in the past. (Understand that we have no family near us that can stop by to help. If there's something major that happens- like a emergency room trip, or a tornado, I'm all on my own. I tend to have bad things happen to me when my husband is out of town- like my car dying an hour away from home, locking myself out of the house or locking my keys in my car, or even setting the house on fire. This has made me a little trepidatious when he's been gone since Sam and Anna have been born- understandably, I think.)

The nice thing this time is that we're all done with bottles and medicine, so the time needed to wash and make bottles and prepare the reflux meds after Sam and Anna went to bed does not need to be devoted to that anymore. It will be a little easier to get us all out the door by 7 am because I won't have to give them each a bottle before we go. I may have worked up a sweat trying to feed, bathe, and get both of my very mobile little ones to bed tonight by myself, but it isn't as stressful as it used to be. (Sam and Anna are at a stage right now where they are a little jealous of the other one getting attention from a parent if they aren't. This will probably make this week a little more interesting when there's only one parent to go around!)

I'm just crossing my fingers that we have a good sleep week, because the hardest part is being up at all hours without having someone to tag team with when you have to get up at 5 am to get ready for work. Anna had a lot of issues with a storm this weekend and I didn't really fall asleep until the storms past around 3 am, so I really hope there's no lightning or thunder in store any evening this week! I think she was afraid of the lightning flashes, but she was okay as long as I was holding her (similar to other things she is afraid of, like our vacuum). I was finally able to keep her in her crib sleeping successfully at 2 am.

Sam had a little trouble falling asleep tonight probably due to the slight variance in our bedtime routine since it was just me or maybe due to the high winds in our area... at one point I went to listen at the door to see if he had finally fallen asleep and I swear I heard "Anna, wake up." This does not bode well for tonight's sleep...

*Pat Pat*

Myself and two 9 month old babies changed, dressed and fed, medicine administered, dog let out and out the door before 7 am to daycare and even made it to work 5 minutes early! All by myself! Yeah, that's me patting myself on the back. :)

And Now I'll Really Be Outnumbered

Sam and Anna have a new favorite activity that is oh-so-cute: they love to race each other down our hall. Each one moves as fast as possible to get ahead, and then turns and giggles at their sibling, teasing them, seeing how close behind they are. It is frickin' adorable, and yes, I do have a few videos of it.

This also means I have two crawlers.

And boy, oh, boy do things change when you're outnumbered by crawlers. When Sam started crawling, Anna was a pretty happy independent player. I could plop her down in front of a interesting toy and go fetch my adventurous son away from whatever trouble he was about to get into. Now things are much more interesting. We divide and conquer as much as possible- "Honey- grab Sam- he's about to tip the humidifier!" or "Watch Anna so I can grab Sam before he shuts the door on his fingers!" and so on.

While Anna is getting more adventurous, Sam is fearless. Over my winter break, he learned how to climb a few stairs, pull up on everything, open drawers and cabinets, shut open doors, etc. and don't forget he discovered a way to climb out of an exersaucer right before the holidays, too. If he's not doing one of those things, he's headed for a cord that we can't hide or eliminate or the fireplace doors that I can't figure out a way to babyproof. He's always into something, and I can't baby proof everything. Anna just delights in following her brother in his explorations... or sometimes veering off in a different direction on her own adventure (usually precipitated by where our dog is at that moment). They are really keeping us on our toes now- but at least we aren't usually outnumbered for more than an hour or two at a time.

However, this week will be my third solo parenting expedition since Sam and Anna were born. My husband leaves Wednesday and returns late Saturday. Gone are the days when I could leave a baby laying on the floor and confidently change the other in one swift motion with my back turned, knowing the floor baby would be just fine. Olympic level diaper changing also happens now, which means it can take up to 10 minutes sometimes to get the darn thing on correctly on a wiggly baby who wants nothing to do with laying still and wants everything to do with crawling or climbing and attempts to do one of those things every second during a diaper/clothing change.

I know I can do it all by myself because I have before, but I have a new layer of worry that didn't exist before this time. I'm more worried than ever that we won't all make it to Daddy's return unscathed. Will Sam shut his finger in the drawers, will Anna get trampled by a 60 lb dog, will a baby fall several feet from some piece of furniture? I have nightmares that Sam will soon figure out how to climb out of his crib. That day is coming- and what on earth do I do when that time is here? This is also the first trip where no help is coming for even part of the time. It is the first time I have to get all 3 of us ready and out the door by 7 am, in the winter to boot and for several days in a row. (I'm only a little sheepish to share that I chickened out last time, and took two personal days off of work so I wouldn't have to do that by myself.)

I can't wait to type the post explaining how it went much better than I thought and that not only did we survive, but we succeeded. That post will also mean that my latest solo parenting experience will be over.

Then I get a week break before being outnumbered again. The end of January is looking pretty attractive right now...

How the Weekend Went

Well, I did survive the weekend. My husband left Friday evening, right before the babies' dinner. That was the first time I fed them solids all by myself (not a big deal, just something we've done together so far). It was totally do-able alone, just harder to keep them from getting food everywhere. We had just started carrots, and Anna hates them with a passion. Sam- he thinks carrots are hilariously delicious. No joke- he laughs and giggles through just about every bite, and carrots have been one of the only food we've tried (besides banana) that he opens his little mouth very wide for.

The evening went fine, even though b.b. (before babies) I would always be exhausted on a Friday night after teaching kindergartners all week, so a.b. (after babies) I am the walking dead on a Friday. Seriously, I am so tired I am physically ill some evenings. Teaching kindergartners full time plus being a full time mommy to twin 6 month olds is like running a marathon every single day, on less than 6 hours of sleep to boot.

Bedtime went okay Friday- it took twice as long to go through all the motions of pjs, books, bottles, etc. so it was tricky to keep a tired baby awake while I fed one and put one to bed first. I actually had to stop feeding Anna mid-bottle and start feeding Sam because Sam was dozing off in our swing, and once he's asleep for bedtime, nothing will wake him up for a long time. (Although all summer long I bottle fed both babies at the same time, I did not do that this weekend. They haven't been tandem fed on boppies since August and since then they have gotten increasingly distracted and wiggly. I chose to fed one at a time to ensure we got good feedings all weekend.)

Night time went okay too- Sam is still getting up once a night to eat, and we're finally considering attempting to wean him from that, since their eating seems to be stabilized and not a concern anymore. Saturday went well- they both took good naps, and we went shopping to break up the day. Sam and Anna are always in good spirits when we go out and about now, I always get compliments from other people at how content and happy they are while I'm shopping. I indulged and got a bunch of outfits for both of them since we're transitioning to 6-9 month clothing. :)

Saturday evening was not the best. Sam woke Anna up mid-night, and it is impossible to get both back to sleep when the other one is fussing/babbling in their crib. Eventually, they did go back to sleep and momma did too. However, their nighttime sleep disruptions impacted their naps the next day, and for the first time in a long time, on Sunday we had short crapnaps only. My husband was planning on being home for bathtime that evening, but because of road construction he was running behind. I ended up giving Anna her bath (Since baths are my husband's bonding time with the babes, I haven't done bathtime since they were newborns). Whew! Boy was I thrilled when he walked in the door and could take over with Sam's bath.

Believe me, by the time he got home I was ready for a baby break. It was nuts solo parenting twin babies for over 48 hours without any help at all. I thought I was busy before- this brought a whole new level to being busy. I did not really sit down all weekend- once they were napping, I ran around trying to eat, do laundry, wash and make bottles, etc. before collapsing in my bed for the night. I don't think I turned on our tv all weekend either.

I know several people who take care of two children while their significant other is gone for a few days. Although I am not dimishing that that would be hard too, two babies the same age is just different. Typically one child can feed themself and walk if you have two children that aren't twins. Often two children will have staggered bedtimes to reflect their ages. Two babies that need the same level of care is totally and utterly exhausting by yourself for an extended period of time. So I feel pretty darn good about being able to successful do it without any mishaps or super stressful points.

One thing I should mention is that a while ago, my mother had mentioned coming to help this weekend. The closer we got to it, she didn't mention it. (I think she forgot) In a way, I didn't want to mention it either, because I was partly hoping she wouldn't come so that I could just have some time with my babies to myself. My mother is kind of exhausting herself- always talking to me and although the help would be nice, I knew I would be craving the downtime by myself when the babies were asleep. I was actually considering thinking of a way to ask her not to come. But, on the other hand, I was slightly irritated that she finked on me. My MIL is coming for the entire week that my husband will be gone next week- my own mother couldn't offer to be here on a weekend that a little help would be nice? Oh, and she is coming in a few weeks for a weekend- because she has two days off of school and wants to come. It's even a little more irritating to me that she'll come when it is convenient for her but not for us. Our fall weekends with all four of us as a family are limited (hunting season and all) and I don't really want her to take one of them up by visiting. But, I am just trying to keep in my head that she's not coming for me, and Sam and Anna will benefit from a little grandma time, even if it isn't what I want.

So overall, things went better than I thought, I was more tired than I thought, and I'm pretty confident I could do it again without issues. My saving grace was that there were no weekdays that I had to get everyone up, ready and out the door before 7 am. When that happens- we all may just sleep in our clothes!